Not eating the foods I love, is like a having a bad break up. You know how when your break up is new, and something happens that your boyfriend usually does for you or participates in, and then he isn’t there anymore and it really hits home that it’s really over? That’s what this new lifestyle feels like.
When I’m bored I go to the fridge and look at all of my options: jello, carnation breakfast drink, smoothie… Nanh!!! Just not as satisfying as a piece of cake, or a juicy cheese burger or big bowl of spaghetti.
I was sitting and talking with the nutrionist on Monday and I was really trying to relay to her how it felt, and all I could think of is, “…it’s like a really bad break up!”
Now that I can eat other things it isn’t hardly as bad. Now it feels like we’re (me and my boyfriend) are back on speaking terms and we’re trying to figure out if we want to try this relationship thing again or not. It’s that awkward feeling where, you know the person still has some issues, but he’s now taking your calls and texting, but it isn’t the same as it was.
Although I’m eating again, this gastric bypass after life is a huge huge adjustment. Eating 1/2 a cup of chili, tuna or yogurt and getting full is a trip. You don’t think you’d get full looking at it, but you get so full. And you almost forget that your stomach is so small. Your eyes are definitely bigger than your stomach these days.
You can’t hurry up and eat, cause that is like someone coughing or sneezing over your food. A serious turn off!!! By the time the food settles and you can take another bite, you don’t even want it.
This week’s challenge is remembering to pace myself and really take my time with the 1/2 a cup of whatever I’m eating and chew, chew, chew.
I’m happy that I’m eating foods, but I’m so not a planner and lunch packer. So when I go back to work, this is going to be a new challenge for me once again.
I’m going back on a part-time basis soon. I’m very relieved to be able to go make some money and take my mind off of the food, menu and protein intake. Even if it is for only four hrs a day.
